of my friends who expects everything of the universe and is disappointed when anything is less than the best, and I found that I begin at the other extreme, expecting nothing, and am always full of thanks for moderate goods. Illustration by Julia Rothman from 'Nature Anatomy. In a sentiment almost Buddhist in its attitude of accepting life exactly as it unfolds, and one that calls to mind his friend and Concord neighbor Thoreau’ssuperb definition of success, Emerson bows before the spiritual rewards of this disposition of gratefulness unburdened by fixation: In the morning I awake and find the old world, wife, babes, and mother... posted on Aug 3 2015 (12,352 reads)

below for helping others change will work to some degree on its own, combining them is even more effective. 1. Lead by example This essay is adapted from Smart Change: Five Tools to Create New and Sustainable Habits in Yourself and Others (TarcherPerigee, 2014). If you want other people to change, start with yourself and make sure the things you want them to change about themselves are things you do effectively yourself. “Do as I say and not as I do” is not a formula for success. But that’s only the first step. It is important to engage visibly in the goals that you want them to adopt. When you lead by example, your actions will serve as a source of goal cont... posted on Mar 22 2016 (26,354 reads)

But somehow—in a journey he recounts in his new book, Into the Magic Shop—he managed to overcome them. Dr. Doty is now a clinical professor of neurosurgery at Stanford University. He founded and directs the Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education (CCARE), where the Dalai Lama was a founding benefactor. As a philanthropist, he has given millions of dollars to support health care and educational charities around the world. He attributes his success partly to a kind woman named Ruth, who took 12-year-old Doty under her wing. Over the course of a memorable summer, she taught him techniques of mindfulness, visualization, and compa... posted on Jul 5 2016 (56,504 reads)

in one’s purpose. As an aspiring “ad man” in the Mad Men era, lured by “the fast car and other large toys that seemed to be the accessories [of] selfhood” — something supplanted today, perhaps, by the startup-lifestyle fetishism afflicting many young people — he awoke one day to a distinct and chilling realization: The life I am living is not the same as the life that wants to live in me. Speaking to the notion that a large part of success is defining it for ourselves, and defining it in terms as close to Thoreau’s as possible, Palmer reflects on his youth: I lined up the loftiest ideals I could find an... posted on Dec 2 2016 (23,173 reads)

announces Black Friday closure at 143 stores as part of #OptOutside initiative. Credit: Suzi Pratt/Getty Images for REI. As any entrepreneur will tell you, success requires sacrifice. And this has never been truer for business leaders who have resolved to put purpose first. By sacrifice, we don’t mean getting up at the crack of dawn or having your social life squeezed, although these may be part and parcel of your purpose journey. We’re talking about the scary moments when staying true to your mission seems to risk the short-term health of your bottom line. The road to realising your purpose to its fullest can sometimes call for audacious, counterintuitive sacrif... posted on Jun 28 2017 (15,574 reads)

business partner through a colleague at a conference. Researchers have referred to these kinds of ties, as well as other types of looser connections such as neighborhood acquaintances, as bridging capital. Bridging capital may involve weaker ties, but the breadth and diversity of these ties can expose us to new ideas and opportunities beyond what is available in our narrower inner circles. Research suggests that job seekers who have wide-ranging weak ties are actually more likely to be successful in their search than those who have stronger close relationships. In addition, studies show that people with a large amount of bridging capital have a greater sense of connection to the bro... posted on Sep 6 2017 (7,184 reads)

and choosing the same old conversations to talk about a difficult situation. He was reinforcing the parent–child relationship embedded in the culture. By choosing words of reassurance, by promising to define and solve the problems and telling employees they shouldn’t worry about the company’s future, he was treating employees as children who needed caretaking and protecting. However, what he needed in these circumstances were capable adults who would participate in creating a successful organization and own their accountability for finding solutions. We suggested he try a new conversation by changing his view of the people who show up to work every day and the words he cho... posted on Oct 22 2017 (11,948 reads)

what you have to say about that, how those things can really be linked for many of us. Dan Millman: As many of your listeners understand, the word "disillusion" sounds negative but it also could be interpreted as a freeing from illusion—dis-illusion. So, one of the reasons, Tami, that I ended up exploring as much as I did is I was sensitive to this process of disillusion. I was fortunate enough to come from a very stable environment as a youth and I had a measure of success in the sports arena and did fine in school and so on. My life seemed to be going well, and yet I noticed nothing seemed to last—happiness, satisfaction, fulfillment [were] just until the... posted on Jul 13 2018 (13,310 reads)

or with whom you work—it’s possible to show more of your true self and become more satisfied, effective, and free. And whether you’re a business owner, leader, or just someone who wants to have more influence, leading with authenticity allows you to impact your team’s culture so that they can be more authentic, too—which will unlock greater creativity, connection, and performance for your company. Here are five specific things you can do to be more effective, successful, and engaged at work, while encouraging others to follow your lead. 1. Be authentic The foundation of bringing your whole self to work is authenticity, which is about showing up hones... posted on Sep 30 2018 (8,099 reads)

robs us of the very capacity for joy and wonder that makes life worth living — for, as Annie Dillard memorably put it, “how we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.” “Expect anything worthwhile to take a long time.” This is borrowed from the wise and wonderful Debbie Millman, for it’s hard to better capture something so fundamental yet so impatiently overlooked in our culture of immediacy. The myth of the overnight success is just that — a myth — as well as a reminder that our present definition of success needs serious retuning. As I’ve reflected elsewhere, the flower doesn’t g... posted on Oct 31 2019 (16,617 reads)

potlatches or the Kula ring cycle, in which gifts circulate in the group, solidifying bonds of relationship and redistributing wealth. The question of abundance highlights the striking difference between the market economies which have come to dominate the globe and the ancient gift economies which preceded them. There are many examples of functioning gift economies—most in small societies of close relations, where community well-being is recognized as the “unit” of success—where the interest of “we” exceeds that of “I.” In this time when the economies have grown so large and impersonal that they extinguish rather than nurture commun... posted on Jan 19 2021 (10,468 reads)

Snyder’s saying: ‘Go somewhere and stop.’” Tanya acknowledges that’s harder to do without the family roots that make it obvious where one might dig in. A lot of these folks “want safety; they want something to enfold them and make a safe place to be,” which she understands. “That’s what I was looking for, to come back here, to be here for my children.” When people finally find a place to stop, what’s the next step in making a successful home? “Well, first, you have to be in it,” she says, meaning that people have to commit to staying put, working together, eating together as part of their daily routine. That... posted on Nov 24 2021 (5,819 reads)

positive neighborhoods. The program is part of a growing trend of “whole-neighborhood” projects around the country that seek more comprehensive ways to improve the lives of children in impoverished communities. This approach has been made famous, in part, by the Harlem Children’s Zone (HCZ), a program that coordinates multiple social and educational services for residents in a 100-block radius of Harlem to help their youth stay in school and out of trouble. The success of HCZ inspired the Obama Administration to introduce the Promise Neighborhoods Initiative, a program offering one-year grants to support non-profit and community-based organizations in d... posted on Jun 2 2011 (11,277 reads)

action in the world. These leaders recognize and value social identities based on nationality, religion, race, gender, politics, education and culture, without rigid intolerant boundaries and relate to these diverse aspects with ease and respect. They also recognize that we all have different personal styles of expression—different personalities—unique ways of moving in the world. They are able to work with professional skills, talents and abilities in the world towards achieving success, prosperity and service. Their ability to work with multiple profiles is extremely valuable. Too many local and global wars are revved up and fought on social identities or profiles!  ... posted on Jul 20 2012 (17,407 reads)

which the poet saw as planting the seeds of intolerance. On April 19, 1919, Tagore writes: Dear Mahatmaji, Power in all its forms is irrational; it is like the horse that drags the carriage blindfolded. The moral element in it is only represented in the man who drives the horse. Passive resistance is a force which is not necessarily moral in itself; it can be used against truth as well as for it. The danger inherent in all force grows stronger when it is likely to gain success, for then it becomes temptation. I know your teaching is to fight against evil by the help of good. But such a fight is for heroes and not for men led by impulses of the moment. Evil on ... posted on Feb 7 2013 (14,524 reads)

looking for acceptance, approval, accolades, wild thunderous applause? Is it painful when you don’t get those things? You’re probably performing. If you’re experiencing, on the other hand, you’re exploring what something feels like. Trying to see what would happen if… When you’re experiencing, you can appreciate negative outcomes as well as positive ones. Sure, acceptance and approval and accolades feel good, but those things don’t determine success. Success is based on whether you fully immerse yourself in the experience, no matter how it turns out, and whether you learn from it. That’s a result you can always achieve regardless of... posted on Feb 10 2013 (28,648 reads)

consecutive titles not once, but twice, from '91 to '93 and '96 to '98. Then he did it yet again with the Lakers and Shaquille O'Neal and Kobe Bryant, from '00 to '02. Before Jackson arrived, both the Bulls and the Lakers were teams that, despite the presence of breathtaking talent, had failed to achieve the harmony needed to win championships. Yet under his guidance, schooled in his characteristically unselfish, team-oriented style, they went on to record-breaking success. So what does this remarkable head coach have to say about the heightened group consciousness that can awaken when teams come together beyond the divisive forces of the ego? WIE spok... posted on May 13 2013 (34,665 reads)

during encoding.  When it comes to discovering the details, bear in mind that our brains evolved to learn is through trial-and-error exploration. This is true of learning and adapting to both our social and physical environments. Therefore, using what we learn to attempt to solve real-world problems and adjusting our behaviors or ideas based on the results augments the retention of skills and information. We are born to explore, and teachers who make use of that will probably find more success in the classroom. Tips for Applying Brain Science to the Classroom The brain is a social organ: that’s why it pays for teachers to create positive social experiences in the c... posted on Jun 2 2013 (147,791 reads)

human beings are seekers. We seek love, wealth, security, power, happiness, and recognition. We also seek knowledge. Aristotle said, “All people by nature desire to know.” The desire to know can be very ambitious, like that of the scientists who sought to solve the structure of the DNA molecule, or rather modest. It can be enormously satisfying to know and understand things. What does it take to have intellectual success—to come to know and understand something challenging? Well, you need some raw intelligence and memory, and you need to work hard and persevere when it doesn’t come easily. You’ll be better off if you’re surrounded by learned people ... posted on Jul 10 2013 (34,380 reads)

unable to be motivated to change if you’re depressed. It causes us to lose faith in ourselves, and that’s going to make us less likely to try to change and conditions us for failure.” When we are compassionate with ourselves, however, we can admit that we made a mistake—and then simply try to do better next time. That’s a citizenship skill worth cultivating. 4. Embrace authentic, not hubristic, pride. Pride is a natural emotional response to success and high social status, but some forms of pride are healthier than others. Many recent studies have revealed the downside of what psychologists call “hubristic pride,” which is ... posted on Jul 4 2013 (20,029 reads)