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Of Butterflies & Stillness

Waiting for our departure, something in the sunlight caught my eye. A moving something. A small moving something. Could it really be? A butterfly had landed on the floormat inside the house. Beating its wings ever so slowly, trying to catch its breath. I crept closer, just wanting to capture its beauty in my hands. To admire its simplicity and intricate design. She sensed my presence, and we locked energies. Slowly, slowly, I inhaled and she beat up. I exhaled, she beat down. Me: Inhaling, exhaling. Her:beating up, beating down. 


I pulled in closer and she stopped beating her wings. I held my breath. For fear of her fear, I crouched still and silent. Pulled my body in close, head in knees, bum against ankles. She had a story, I could tell. I imagine she was once a white monarch that flew higher and higher. Not like a bird that soars, but like blue waves on a white sand beach, bouncing and bobbing to anywhere. Like this she traveled laterally, all the way to the sun in a bliss unbound. A ray from the sun hung limp and loose, swaying like a Persian cat's tail. She must have been frightened, caught in this ray. The warmth of sunset orange covered her body like glue and the heat singed the ends of her wings black.

Finally, a release. She opened up again, trusting me. Every scale on her body shone brightly against the fading straw mat every time she stretched open her wings. Where have you been old lady? I asked. Why are you so unafraid of me the giant moving beast?

I just couldn't believe this moment. How lucky was I to have a direct interaction with nature? With one of its inhabitants, who knew I only wanted to learn and listen to the many stories it carried about faraway lands and sweet pollen? My eyes magnified like a telescope and I studied her abdomen nestled in between her wings every time she stretched. We weren't so different, she and I. I too want to rest sometimes, take a breather, soak in my surroundings

There are moments in time that we will remember forever, and they always always catch us by surprise. Which means we can never go looking for them, but only recognize them when they appear and just submit. Submitting to the moment is by far the most rewarding life lesson we can embody. So Thank you, butterfly, thank you for believing in me and my presence, because in your slow and unassuming process you made me stop and watch. You grabbed my attention and held it still, and like a baby, I got lost in your beauty. 

Lately I have been seeing butterflies everywhere. Sometimes they lay on the ground, lifeless, and sometimes they are flitting away joyously with no reservations. It just seemed so paradoxical that butterflies would exist in this crazy town of cars noise and pollution. But they do! They Do! I always pictured them in gardens or fields, but never amongst the trash that sometimes lays across the side streets. What amazing notes of nature's instruments!

Now with heavy steps I stare at the ground and occasionally look up, hoping to catch a glimpse of a flying rainbow.

This article is printed here with permission. Shwetha Sridharan is passionate about the development sector. She previously worked at Arghyam, an NGO that funds water and sanitation projects across rural India. For more information on Nyaya Health and their work and vision of health care for the poor, visit nyayahealth.org or on twitter @nyayahealth.    
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Stephanie Leniczek Jul 13, 2012

What a beautiful story... puts a smile on my face...I am  also a lover of natural  and have a yard filled with flowers and trees...often I just sit on my deck while dragonflies  come and sit on my lips as if to kiss me...butterflies sit on my shoulders and squirrels come to eat out my my hand....there is no greater joy than having a wild animal or insect to interact act with a human...

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Eddie Jun 26, 2012

the beauty of nature

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Petro Jun 4, 2012

I have a special connection with butterflies ... after my daughter passed away. Thank you for a beautiful essay. So well written, so spot-on. May you be blessed with lots of other beaming butterflies.

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Walter E Carter Jr. Jun 3, 2012
I had reached the site in the White Mountains of NewHampshire that I used for my usual three day meditation and cleansing ritual.Only once did I run into other hikers and they were on a day trip and brought abottle of wine to share. This visit was just to recharge. When I got to thesite a large insect buzzed right to my face and without thinking I swatted thedragonfly and knocked it into a bush where it landed motionless. I was still incity mode and was immediately bummed that I had thoughtlessly killed such awonderful creature.I set up my tent, hand ground some coffee beans and brewed ashot of espresso. I wandered about, enjoying the thousands of dragonflies andfeasting on wild blackberries. It was truly a magical beautiful day that helpedme center and quiet my mind. I was still upset that I had impulsively reactedand killed the dragonfly. Hours later, I went back to the bush hoping theDragonfly had recovered and flown away. The dragonfly was still on the bush,upside down and not movi... [View Full Comment]
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Tejal Rajyagor Jun 3, 2012
Dear ShwethaI cant tell you how broad is the smile on my face as I read through your article. It felt as if you penned down all those beautiful moments I have been blessed to have shared with butterflies.It has happened so that in recent past, I have been seeing butterflies everywhere. And as you so beautiful wrote - There are moments in time that we will remember forever, and they always always catch us by surprise. This beautiful creature has been visiting me sometimes by quietly sitting next to be on my bed, or by visiting me during my evening walks or by coming and sitting next to me in an auto. And the only feeling I have had all the time is a feeling of deep gratitude!!Wrote this one after one such incidence.'My beautiful connection with the butterflies continues...as I sat in an auto, a lovely black & orange butterfly came and sat next to me :-) giving me yet another reason to feel blessed and to be happy :-)!!Lots of love & hugs :-)Live...feel...experience...love...... [View Full Comment]
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Neville Coventry Jun 3, 2012

Thank you for reminding me that each breath is special, it is the beginning of the next moment and to be savoured.  Neville

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~liz Jun 2, 2012

What a delightful essay. What, I loved most is your unique way of seeing, your description of the butterfly and the images you painted  in your marvelous phrase ,"She had a story, I could
tell. I imagine she was once a white monarch that flew higher and
higher. Not like a bird that soars, but like blue waves on a white sand
beach, bouncing and bobbing to anywhere. Like this she traveled
laterally, all the way to the sun in a bliss unbound." A ray from the sun
hung limp and loose, swaying like a Persian cat's tail. She must have
been frightened, caught in this ray. The warmth of sunset orange covered
her body like glue and the heat singed the ends of her wings black."~liz

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Mariette Jun 2, 2012

Wonderful capture of that stillness. Thank you Shwe for providing a space and reflection for my stillness.

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Heather Jun 2, 2012

I will look for butterflies. Your beautiful story is a reminder to all of us to live in the moment. Thank you for sharing your butterfly encounter with us. 

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Bkjagadish Jun 2, 2012

Nice & Beautiful ....my time well spent browsing thro' ...Thanks for the share !...