BuddingBuddha WOW! Perhaps you are really just beginning to learn the Buddhist ways or any other form of kindness and respect. You can't honestly make a blanket statement for what is "right or wrong" for others. As a "school" teacher what do you actually know about education at home? The idea that home-schooled children are taken out of society is completely inaccurate. My children spend more time per week interacting with others in our society than a kid that sits in the same building 5 days a week. I am not even against public schools in general. We have some wonderfully talented teachers in this country. However, as a society we have shown teachers that they are not valued. Our teachers get paid to little and then give them to many kids in a class. (I will leave it at that.) Frankly, we have shown America's children that they are not valued either. I have gone into our local school and checked out the curriculum my children would be using. Everyday Math and Creative Spelling? Please! How can we be judged by people who don't know anything about us or what we are teaching? How? Fear. That is how.[Hide Full Comment]
Buddingbuddha....and I'm a Buddhist, by the way, but why do people assume homeschooling is removing children from social situations, and team building opportunities? And to be honest, every time I tried being social in school, I was told to "Be Quiet!" Teams? Please, team work meant the nerd (me) did all the work of the project, while the other students did nothing. But I'm sorry, this is a positive site, we shouldn't be negative. Schooling is ok for some, and homeschooling is ok for others. I am homeschooling my boys, though I received my bachelors with the intent to teach high school. Today we met at a homeschool friend's house for board games, tomorrow our fellow homeschool group meets at the community center for art class and field trip planning. Parents are NOT the only adult role models for my children, and what complexities are there to being housed year after year with children ONLY the same age as yourself?! Too many people have opinions about things, thinking that their opinions are fact, without having any true knowledge or experience of a subject. If you think homeschoolers are isolated and not socialized, quit leaving comments and please do a search on: 'your city-homeschool events/groups.' Thank you. And please, broaden your horizons. The idea that there is ever only "ONE" right way to do something is so limiting and biased. New ideas are essential for growth.
Home schooling kids is wrong. I'm a school teacher and I couldn't agree more with these essential skills you describe and I try and deliver these in the classroom. Yes the education system isn't perfect but in my opinion taking a child out of 'society' and homeschooling them is not the answer. How will homeschool children develop social skills and team work? Understanding how to work with others (in all their complexities) is essential in today's society. Having access to a variety of adult role modals with different expertise is crucial. I would never of developed my passion for Music, Philosophy, Astronomy, Art, History, Buddhism (to name a few) from my parents alone. Parents have a hugh impact on a child's education but not exclusively, 'good' schooling is essential too.
When I was a kid parents were the primary educators of these 9 traits.
In a two-full-time-working-parent family there is not enough time to develop and follow a curriculum. I wish you would write an article or a book outlining some of the methods you've found most effective.
Children should be taught to collaborate. Independence is overrated these days. Great things are achieved by teams, not individuals. While we should be happy with ourselves and have our own lives, developing a sense of community is just as important. It's something sadly lacking in society right now. We're too transfixed with the global community.
This article is must read for everyone. Not only as a young parent. I am 60 years and a parent of two grown up adults. I will share this article with them and others. Also I can myself see what I have missed and imbibe them to capture the fullness of living life itself. Thanks for sharing
I must say that this is a great post. Really I am impressed
from this post....the person who creates this post it was a great human. I put
a link to your blog at my site, hope you don't mind?
Very good article. If my father was alive he would be happy some writer is making sense. I appreciate reading articles like this one. Good reading. Good writing. This is good stuff for everyone who has children
This is a good list. I think we need to be careful, however, in advising "Allow your kids to be alone from an early age." If done too early, it can have the opposite effect and cause children either to be overly clingy or desensitized to their own senses.
We don't believe in tolerance, it implies putting up with something... we believe in acceptance of differences, and differing views. I also agree with amy, every moment in your life is a learning moment. When my son was totally homeschooled he'd go to a restaurant with me and figure out the tip, calculate mileage while I was driving, read maps, and read every label. Life is learning!
The only item on the list I question is independence - "they learn that they don’t need a teacher, a parent, or a boss to tell
them what to do. They can manage themselves, and be free, and figure out
the direction they need to take on their own."
Giving them the confidence to stand up on their own is good. Thinking they don't need a teacher, a parent, a boss or anyone else, isn't necessarily good. We need teachers and role models. The reality is that most of us will have bosses telling us what to do.
Managing themselves and figuring out their own direction is good. Thinking they're free to do what they want, whenever they want, without realizing or considering that this may create consequences for others isn't.
Sometimes I think our culture stresses independence as a value too much. We are interdependent.
Hey I'm only 20 but great article! Thank you for sharing your valuable observations!
T things like tolerance and compassion are not skills. They are virtues. The distinction is important: Virtues are not taught. They are cultivated. That has big implications for the structure of schooling, the selection of teachers, the building of school communities and most of all our sense of the purpose of education.
Thanks for a great article. We are home schooling our two children. We live in Ahmedabad, Gujarat, India. We have been doing this for the last three years. They are 7 years old. And I think they are doing really good as far as studies is concerned.
They are really good at relating to children from lesser education or lower income strata. They mingle with them readily and there is no barrier in their mind.
My boy is more active. After his scheduled homework is over, he is now finding it difficult to find out how to fill his time. I am also concerned about the same. My wife, who is dedicated to this cause, she is a home maker and children maker, says he will slowly understand what he wants in life. But since I have not lived life like that, I become nervous.
Kindly share your experiences.
I'm giving my kids a Montessori education, which seems like a pretty good way to give them most of those things suggested above, without the commitment of becoming their teacher - that's something I'm not so passionate about :) And they're thriving, loving school and becoming amazing human beings along the way.
I have to say this sort of method actually works to a degree with some of the older generation. My parents have had mediocre phones for years. I have finally gotten them both into smartphones. I walked both of them through the initial process of discovering that they are very user friendly devices. I have for the most part gotten them to the point where they teach themselves what they want to know. They still have a question here or there but before I finish answering they have already comprehended the process. If they want to do a review, and they say "I press this", I respond with a shrug and say I don't know.
With all this being said, This is the way they raised me. Outcome: I am a very adaptable human being, and I am returning the favor to them.
Oops. That last line should read:
"Thanks for affirming what we do; please support us."
I think it is also important to remember that not all children have parents with the time or the ability to educate their children this way.
There are a lot of teachers like myself (18 years at a public high school) who are educating their students with these values at the core of our teaching. We need the help of parents and the public in general to continue to do this and to expand our efforts so that all students have access to this kind of schooling.
Thanks for affirming we do; please support us.
I sent this to my son to be an example to my grand-daughters. I raised my kids this way (at least I tried to). I have always been proud of them for being "adaptable". Thank you for this post!
I'm married to a man who was educated in just such a way. He was the exception of course in our generation (we are both near 60), but his ability to teach himself, solve problems, adapt to change while being passionate about his work and having compassion for others has served as a great example to our children. (Sadly, my own public school and at-home education was below sub-par, and even that is an understatement.) I'm so grateful for this article as it really voices what I have observed, and I know it will help so many parents who are searching for the best education for their own kids. THANK YOU.
This is great. As an adult, I find it helpful for myself as well. This is not only for children, but perspective for us at all ages. Thank you for sharing!