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灵魂冲浪

在创作电影《灵魂冲浪者》(一个关于青少年的真实故事)剧本时,我…… 在采访冲浪运动员贝瑟妮·汉密尔顿(她在一次鲨鱼袭击中失去了一条胳膊)时,我发现贝瑟妮在可怕的袭击发生不到一个月后就重返大海,再次尝试冲浪。当我问她,她究竟是如何鼓起勇气重返大海的,尤其是在经历了如此可怕的事件之后,她坦诚地告诉我,她知道如果再多等一天,她可能就再也不敢下水了。她告诉我,有些冲浪者在遭遇严重事故后会“自我设限”,反复思考各种“如果……会怎样”,不断重温当时的恐怖场景,直到恐惧让他们动弹不得。最终,他们再也没有机会冲浪了。

生活中,我们常常面临这样的困境——海浪在召唤,我们却僵立在岸边,渴望绝对安全才肯纵身跃入。然而,安全永远无法保证,我们往往还没来得及试探,便已退缩,不敢再尝试。当工作中的想法被否决,我们便选择将心事藏在心底;如果一部心爱的电影再次遭遇搁浅,我们便会变得麻木,开始迎合大众口味,以免再次承受失败的痛苦;一段感情的破裂也总是让我们心灰意冷,不敢再次敞开心扉,害怕再次被拒绝。恐惧似乎总能让我们止步于人生的边缘。

最大的悖论在于,脆弱需要勇气……你必须坚强才能让自己变得柔软。

某种程度上,那场事故中受伤的不仅仅是贝瑟尼的身体——当鲨鱼咬掉她的手臂时,她的心也碎了,因为鲨鱼的袭击几乎夺走了她生命中最挚爱的东西——冲浪。她本可以把自己的心封闭起来,用气泡膜包裹起来,确保自己永远不会再经历这样的失去——但她却选择让伤口敞开,让海水治愈它,重新拥抱她挚爱的海浪,拒绝向恐惧低头。如今,她已是世界上最伟大的冲浪运动员之一,多次获得冠军,激励着千百万人。

冒险并不容易,但我认为从长远来看,更难的是让损失困住你,让你过上平淡无奇的生活,失去胜利的喜悦和爱的荣耀。

贝瑟尼告诉我,害怕再也冲浪的恐惧远大于害怕再次遇到鲨鱼,所以唯一明智的选择就是重返大海。而对我而言,害怕失去生命、害怕永远无法体会爱情,远比害怕偶尔受伤更可怕。这就是为什么每次推销失败后,我都会立刻重新写一个剧本。这就是为什么在经历了痛苦的离婚后,我依然能够拥有美满的婚姻。这也是为什么即使失去了我心爱的老狗阿尔菲,我依然会敞开双臂和心扉去迎接一只新的小狗。

我不想在岸边旁观人生,在孤独的烈日下煎熬,被一颗封闭的心压得喘不过气来。诚然,有时失望的浪潮会将你击垮,有时你会在失去的利齿下失去自我的一部分——但在我们称之为人生的这片浩瀚海洋中,更多时候,你会被某种美好的事物,一股纯粹的爱的浪潮,裹挟着前行。但如果你从未离开岸边,就无法驾驭这股浪潮。所以,勇敢地跳入水中吧——双脚稳稳地踩在冲浪板上,感受风吹拂过你的发梢,感受咸涩与胜利的滋味萦绕唇齿……要知道,我们的灵魂生来就是要乘风破浪的。

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Kristin Pedemonti Jul 20, 2013
So true! I've had 4 bouts of depression, but I Jump back in, leaping into the Unknown and I am Grateful. We ALL need to Dive back in and not allow Fear to leave us on the Shore. It does take great courage to be vulnerable; indeed be Strong to be Soft. Agreed, "Risk is not easy, but I think it is much harder in the long run to let loss trap you into living a bland existence, devoid of the joy of triumph, and the glory of love." Here's to taking Risks! I'm living it every day. After selling my home & possessions to create and facilitate a volunteer literacy project on my own. I just returned from 30 days volunteering in Kenya where I collected True Stories from Widowed Women who Refused to Follow Tradition and are Thriving with a Farming Cooperative. And the True stories of Teen artists in Kibera slum sharing their talents. Their stories will eventually become a book in a partnership. a Risk in reaching out, in being Vulnerable. Feeling Blessed. Thank you so much for the encourageme... [View Full Comment]
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zwater Jul 20, 2013

"Sometimes you lose pieces of yourself to the sharp teeth of loss", that line spoke to me about my life. I've been standing fearfully on "the shore" of my life ever. Just yesterday I was praying for insight as to why I feel so sad and numb. This writing was the answer to that prayer. It's true that it's much more painful not go jump back in, I can attest to that. Dear author, thanks for writing the very words I needed to read this morning. And thanks to Bethany, for modeling this way of living for me.