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Štirje načini, Kako Vas Lahko sreča poškoduje

V zadnjih letih smo bili priča eksploziji znanstvenih raziskav, ki razkrivajo, kako so pozitivni občutki, kot je sreča, dobri za nas. Vemo, da nas motivirajo k zasledovanju pomembnih ciljev in premagovanju ovir, ščitijo nas pred nekaterimi posledicami stresa, tesno povezujejo z drugimi ljudmi in celo odganjajo telesne in duševne bolezni.

Zaradi tega je sreča postala precej trendovska. Znanost o sreči je prišla na naslovnice časopisov Time , Oprah in celo The Economist ter ustvarila majhno industrijo motivacijskih govorcev, psihoterapevtov in raziskovalnih podjetij. To spletno mesto, Greater Good , vsebuje približno 400 člankov o sreči , njegov blog o starševstvu pa govori posebej o vzgoji srečnih otrok .

Jasno je, da je sreča priljubljena. Toda ali je sreča vedno dobra? Je predobro počutje lahko kdaj slabo? Raziskovalci šele začenjajo resno raziskovati ta vprašanja z dobrim razlogom: s prepoznavanjem potencialnih pasti sreče si omogočimo, da jo globlje razumemo in se naučimo bolje spodbujati bolj zdravo in uravnoteženo življenje.

Skupaj s kolegicama Iris Mauss in Mayo Tamir sem pregledal nastajajoče znanstvene raziskave o temni strani sreče in izvedli smo lastno raziskavo na to temo. Te študije so razkrile štiri načine, kako je lahko sreča za nas slaba.

1. Zaradi preveč sreče ste lahko manj ustvarjalni in manj varni.

Izkazalo se je, da ima sreča svojo ceno, če jo doživljamo preveč intenzivno.

Pogosto nam na primer pravijo, da lahko sreča odpre naš um, da spodbudimo bolj ustvarjalno razmišljanje in nam pomaga pri reševanju težav ali ugank. Tako je, ko doživljamo zmerne ravni sreče. Toda glede na metaanalizo Marka Alana Davisa iz leta 2008 o razmerju med razpoloženjem in ustvarjalnostjo, ko ljudje doživijo intenzivno in morda izjemno veliko sreče, ne doživijo več istega povečanja ustvarjalnosti. In v skrajnih primerih, kot je manija, ljudje izgubijo sposobnost, da izkoristijo in usmerijo svoje notranje ustvarjalne vire. Še več, psihologinja Barbara Fredrickson je ugotovila, da preveč pozitivnih čustev – in premalo negativnih čustev – dela ljudi neprilagodljive pred novimi izzivi.

Ne samo, da pretirana sreča včasih izniči koristi, ki jih ima za nas – lahko dejansko povzroči psihološko škodo. Zakaj? Odgovor se morda skriva v namenu in funkciji sreče. Ko izkusimo srečo, se naša pozornost usmeri k vznemirljivim in pozitivnim stvarem v našem življenju, da bi ohranili dober občutek. Ko se počutimo srečni, se tudi počutimo manj ovirani in bolj verjetno bomo raziskovali nove možnosti in tvegali.

Popeljite to funkcijo sreče do skrajnosti. Predstavljajte si nekoga, ki ima premočan gon, da se osredotoča samo na pozitivne stvari okoli sebe in tvega ogromnih razsežnosti. Lahko se nagibajo k temu, da spregledajo ali zanemarijo opozorilne znake v svojem okolju ali pa naredijo drzne skoke in tvegane korake, tudi če zunanji znaki kažejo, da so dobički malo verjetni.

Ljudje v tem povečanem načinu 'happiness overdrive' se zapletajo v bolj tvegano vedenje in ponavadi ne upoštevajo groženj, vključno s prekomernim uživanjem alkohola, prenajedanjem, spolno promiskuiteto in uporabo drog. V študiji iz leta 1993 je psiholog Howard S. Friedman s sodelavci ugotovil, da so imeli šoloobvezni otroci, ki so jih starši in učitelji ocenili kot »zelo vesele«, večje tveganje umrljivosti, ko so jih spremljali v odrasli dobi, morda zato, ker so bili bolj tvegani.

Vsi ti rezultati kažejo na eno ugotovitev: sreča je morda najboljša, če jo doživljamo zmerno – ne premalo, pa tudi ne preveč.

2. Sreča ni primerna za vsako situacijo.

Naša čustva nam pomagajo, da se prilagodimo novim okoliščinam, izzivom in priložnostim. Jeza nas mobilizira, da premagujemo ovire; strah nas opozori na grožnje in vključi naš sistem priprave na boj ali beg; žalost nakazuje izgubo. Ta čustva nam omogočajo, da zadovoljimo posebne potrebe v specifičnih okoliščinah.

Enako velja za srečo – pomaga nam slediti in dosegati pomembne cilje ter nas spodbuja k sodelovanju z drugimi. Toda tako kot ne bi želeli biti jezni ali žalostni v vsakem kontekstu, ne bi smeli želeti izkusiti sreče v vsakem kontekstu.

Kot je trdil psiholog Charles Carver, nam pozitivna čustva, kot je sreča, sporočajo, da so naši cilji izpolnjeni, kar nam omogoča, da upočasnimo, stopimo nazaj in se miselno umirimo. Zato nam lahko sreča v tekmovanju dejansko škodi. Razsvetljujoče študije, ki jih je izvedla Maya Tamir, so pokazale, da so se ljudje v veselem razpoloženju ob igranju tekmovalne računalniške igrice izkazali slabše kot ljudje v jezi.

V mojem lastnem laboratoriju smo ugotovili, da so bili posamezniki, ki doživljajo srečo v neprimernih kontekstih – kot je gledanje filma o joku majhnega otroka ali tisti prizor iz Trainspottinga , ko Ewan McGregor koplje po gnusnem stranišču, pokritem s fekalijami – večje tveganje za razvoj čustvene motnje manije.

Josh Gosfield/Corbis

Sreča ima svoj čas in kraj – ni primerna za vsako situacijo!

3. Niso vse vrste sreče dobre za vas.

»Sreča« je en sam izraz, vendar se nanaša na mavrico različnih okusov čustev: nekatera nas naredijo bolj energične, nekatera nas upočasnijo; zaradi nekaterih se počutimo bližje drugim ljudem, zaradi nekaterih smo velikodušnejši.

Toda ali vse vrste sreče spodbujajo te koristi? Zdi se, da ne. Pravzaprav bolj niansirana analiza različnih vrst sreče kaže, da so nekatere oblike dejansko lahko vir disfunkcije.

En primer je ponos, prijeten občutek, povezan z dosežki in višjim družbenim položajem ali statusom. Kot taka se pogosto vidi kot vrsta pozitivnega čustva, zaradi katerega se bolj osredotočamo nase. Ponos je lahko dober v določenih kontekstih in oblikah, kot je zmaga na težki nagradi ali napredovanje v službi.

Vendar pa moja raziskava s Sheri Johnson in Dacherjem Keltnerjem ugotavlja, da lahko, ko doživljamo preveč ponosa ali ponosa brez resničnih zaslug, to vodi do negativnih družbenih rezultatov, kot je agresivnost do drugih, antisocialno vedenje in celo povečano tveganje za motnje razpoloženja, kot je manija. Delo, ki poteka v mojem laboratoriju in ga vodi podiplomska študentka Hillary Devlin, podpira mamljivo idejo, da vase osredotočena pozitivna čustva, kot je ponos, dejansko lahko ovirajo našo sposobnost empatije ali zavzemanja perspektive druge osebe v težkih čustvenih trenutkih.

Bistvo: nekatere vrste sreče lahko včasih ovirajo našo sposobnost povezovanja s tistimi okoli nas.

4. Iskanje sreče vas lahko dejansko naredi nesrečne.

Ni presenetljivo, da si večina ljudi želi biti srečnih. Zdi se, da smo naravnani na iskanje sreče, in to še posebej velja za Američane – to je celo zakoreninjeno v naši Deklaraciji neodvisnosti.

Pa vendar je iskanje sreče zdravo? Prelomno delo Iris Mauss je nedavno podprlo nasprotno intuitivno idejo, da lahko prizadevanje za srečo dejansko povzroči več škode kot koristi. Pravzaprav se včasih zdi, da bolj ko ljudje iščejo srečo, manj se zdi, da jo lahko dosežejo. Mauss pokaže, da bolj ko si ljudje prizadevajo za srečo, večja je verjetnost, da bodo postavili visoke standarde za srečo – nato pa bodo razočarani, ko ta standard ne bo dosežen. To še posebej velja, ko so bili ljudje v pozitivnem kontekstu, kot je poslušanje optimistične pesmi ali gledanje pozitivnega filmskega posnetka. Kot da bolj ko se človek trudi izkusiti srečo, težje se dejansko počuti srečnega, tudi v sicer prijetnih situacijah.

Moji kolegi in jaz gradimo na tej raziskavi, ki nakazuje, da je iskanje sreče povezano tudi z resnimi težavami v duševnem zdravju, kot sta depresija in bipolarna motnja. Mogoče je, da prizadevanje za srečo nekatere od nas dejansko spravlja ob pamet.

Kako najti zdravo srečo?

Toda kako točno lahko dosežemo zdrav odmerek sreče? To je vprašanje za milijon dolarjev.

Prvič, pomembno je doživeti srečo v pravi meri. Premalo sreče je prav tako problematično kot preveč. Drugič, sreča ima čas in kraj, zato moramo biti pozorni na kontekst ali situacijo, v kateri doživljamo srečo. Tretjič, pomembno je vzpostaviti čustveno ravnovesje. Sreče ne moremo doživeti na račun negativnih čustev, kot so žalost, jeza ali krivda. Vse to je del zapletenega recepta za čustveno zdravje in nam pomaga doseči bolj utemeljeno perspektivo. Čustveno ravnovesje je ključnega pomena.

Nazadnje je pomembno, da si prizadevamo za srečo in jo doživljamo iz pravih razlogov. Prevelika osredotočenost na prizadevanje za srečo kot cilj sam po sebi je lahko dejansko pogubna. Namesto vnetega iskanja sreče bi si morali prizadevati za sprejemanje našega trenutnega čustvenega stanja, kakršno koli že je. Zdi se, da resnična sreča izvira iz spodbujanja prijaznosti do drugih – in do sebe.

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27 PAST RESPONSES

User avatar
me123 Jun 13, 2012

This is an interesting and controversial article. I love stuff like this. First of all I do believe that too much happiness can be unhealthy, in a sence that too much water is unhealthy. you can die from too much water but it has to be gallons at one time. I think that just like a relationship if you don't argue every once in a while then how are you going to know you truly love the person and care for them.  As human beings we need different emotions, happy, sad, frustrated, infuriating; Without these emotions we can not love because we dont know what is good and what is bad. With the persuite of happeness i think the article pined the nail on the donkey with that one, as for everything else, i think they did not word it properly.  

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MegGuest Jun 5, 2012
As I read comments that criticize the article, I generally agree: problems with definition of happiness, over-emphasis on mania, surprising and I think challengable link to excessive risk choices because "happiness" might block mindful self-care.  At least one comment mentions a general feeling of "contentment" as a description of what might be meant by "happiness", and this resonates with me.   Others might add "feeling in harmony with oneself and relationship to larger world".  Still others might add "feeling a general personal confidence about oneself in relationship to larger world."One negative aspect of "happiness" I was surprised to *not* find is mentioned, but not developed. This is a link between an individual "happiness" and reduced ability to empathize.  The possibility of such a link is worthy of thought.  The culture has been through a few decades of individuals pursuing personal development, with emphasis on "individual" and "personal" .   In general, to my obse... [View Full Comment]
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Noor a.f May 29, 2012

mr Stanford of today's daily was annoyed. ms Tippett, doesn't know even smallest provocation that made Standford behave such uncontrolled behavior. you know, I didn't do anything bad. So why frightening again. The saddest thing is that Ms can't guess why you write that but she can understand you are annoyed. Review the causes please instead using force or strangling an innocent miss. She doesn't know car accidents or anything bad happened to you but she understands that you felt pain which she didn't cause. if it is that small statements "woman spoke up"which she apologized, accept apologies.  If you would like Ms completely truss in you, you have to talk where you believe she doesn't. It is simple and if you continue spinal things, you are forcing a Ms to become Mr. Ms really feels that you have some type of pain but she didn't cause-trust her.

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Noor a.f May 29, 2012

@Jeanine, am listening please. thank you

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Happiness 1st May 29, 2012

Pursuing happiness is not "BEing happy".

You are doing a disservice to people by this article.

Emotions are a sense, like taste, touch, smell, hearing and seeing.

Emotions come in response to thoughts.

They also provide guidance from your "Higher Self".

Your Higher Self sends you a message that says "that is the right direction" when you think a thought that feels better than the last thought you thought.

When your new thought feels worse the message is "You're going the wrong way now.  Turn around."

It is as simple as this and not listening to the guidance is never the right choice.

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Noor a.f May 28, 2012

@travelmmn:disqus pursuing happiness doesn't cause the two. I posit there can be relations like my case where happiness is pursued in dread. What do you think, they need to pursue? Some are said need marriage, some doctors, some divine. What do you think, Travelmmn?  

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travelernnn May 28, 2012

The assertion that research suggests that pursuit of happiness is associated with serious mental health problems, such as depression and bipolar disorder implies that pursuing happiness causes these disorders, but I would hope researchers would look into causality. I would posit that people with depression or bipolar disorder are more likely to pursue happiness, as they feel this is what they lack, which would lead to this association, not the other way around.  

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Noor a.f May 27, 2012

@3f80abfeff1e02b26cdef8954007e98c:disqus it was not wasted time. It was to knowledge and others might benefited it.
Thank you  

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Sundisilver May 27, 2012

As I was reading this, all I could think about was how wasteful is to spend so much time THINKING about why happiness is not good instead of just going out and living your life and stumbling onto little happy moments betwixt and between the others.   And then remembering to appreciate them instead of stopping to ask yourself if this is a happy moment or is this a moment that's not really good for me.   I think too much thinking about it sorta ruins the whole experience. 

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Noor a.f May 26, 2012

today's dailygood got me right. I remember operating a store of scientific research age 17. Mine wasn't nuclear but animals esp insects. My big problem was how I could keep people away from the store of the study. I was exactly like Taylor because the word "can't" I don't believe. Hazmat team and arrest isn't known and  never liked. It is always good to make understandable because one might cleaned family's contaminated for may be another family.what is the other please?catastrophic result? that is scaring and is not known. well, Taylor is with you and feels sorry for your time. Well, Washington can't say 'get this very small to die or to live with it for being honesty and stupid awesome."
 The story interested me I had forehead and eyes pain I thought Computer caused but didn't feel while I was reading today's daily.
Thank you

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Noor a.f May 25, 2012
@Kayee, well, I give my definition to the website of last night. Didn't it publish? I wrote a lot of explanations. And happy people connect people around them. but if happy people are busy on things they don't. it is a meaningful question. @be276523f26ecbd80bf429fabaafa852:disqus  , I followed the link but mbs ended anyway it was interesting how the guy talked. I will update unlimited internet. West striving materials, they are right because I one time tried a woman near her car. she was standing and I was practicing accent I just copied from a movie. So I wanted to greet her yet she saw me before. She just looked very innocent and changed the direction. I was really embarrassed because my intention wasn't to cause inconvenience. I then thought of how such issue could be addressed. I started a work. The work then threatened my well-being and sucked my savings. I then asked myself, do I deserve? I then continued not knowing realities because money lost in good is good. This story is no... [View Full Comment]
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Pat Armitstead May 25, 2012

My belief is that joy is all of it ...the very fact that we can experience all the emotions and can be at choice as to how we respond is joyful empowerment.  I like the whole notion of leading a happy, engaged and meaningful life...irrespective of current circumstances.  My radio program presents a holistic and integrated approach to wellbing, tapping into the sugnature strengths, multiple intelligences and using the art of improv ( acting) to be in the moment.  www.planetaudio.org.nz/radi...

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Rickaung May 25, 2012

The article completely misses the point about happiness. Happiness is never achieved by pursuing it. Achieving goals and material wealth gives a temporary feeling of well being but true happiness comes from within. The West seems obsessed with material gains and success believing when they have been achieved one will be happy but when one reaches the goal we change The goal Suggest listen to TED talk by Shawn Achor VERY FUNNY AND INFORMATIVE Check out this amazing TED Talk:

Shawn Achor: The happy secret to better work
http://www.ted.com/talks/sh...

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Kayce May 24, 2012

I have never met a person who is constantly in a happiness mode.  Most people that I had ever, met seem to have a range of emotions.  This sounds like an article one had to write to get their name on something just to say they have something in print.  What is the writer's definition of happiness?  I would think contentment would be a very nice goal in life and would create a balanced life as well.  This could also be described as happiness.  Can a happy person really be hindered to connect with those around them, Really? 

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Noor a.f May 24, 2012

@facebook-100002669703787:disqus  we always do many things but we have to balance them. No one can be 100% good. but what I know is that the more we try to be good the more we are.

I posted a comment to http://smartliving365.com/?...
about happiness am not sure if it waits published.

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Alex Mart May 24, 2012
This article caught my eye because it follows the kind of "too much good is bad" scare tactic of a lot of healthy living articles.I really relate with the part about the pursuit of happiness. I've always been the ambitious type, people-pleaser, cheerful host. Almost my whole life, I've poured my energy into APPEARING happy to make other people around me feel good, to make other people around me feel like I had everything under control and the world on my side.Especially once I began Health Coaching as a career, I wanted people to see that I'd figured it all out and was living the dream life. Behind closed doors, though, I was super stressed, I was binge eating sweets at night, I was feeling like a failure and a fraud, and was deeply UNhappy.It took a lot of work and opening to see how I needed to take time and energy to nourish myself, relax and feed my own soul. I was giving and working way too much - trying to be a happy success - and starving myself of the stuff a happy life is made... [View Full Comment]
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Favik May 24, 2012

what else can i say. it is all a bulk of good writig and composite combination of intellectual make-up. just really likes it.

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fhet May 24, 2012

I believe it is better to BE happy than to PURSUIT happiness. Being happy means for me, being content with my life, appreciating what is around me and experience life every second as a great gift and chance. This also includes changing things that make me angry. Enjoy your lifes, everyone! It is the only one we've got.

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Kathy @ SMART LIving 365.com May 24, 2012

I agree that the blind pursuit of happiness can be problematic--that's because we often have opposing definitions of what it really means.  That's why I wrote a blog post that defines happiness in a way that makes it more sense of well-being than just a giddy emotion...if interested, here is a link to the article....  http://smartliving365.com/?...  

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Noor a.f May 24, 2012
great science. I was one of the people who were know excited all the times. I was and I like to be happy always. Well, I agree to be more happy can make one loose creativity and loose the idea of making development. As I said I overdrive happiness but if am to employ a worker I would prefer one who doesn't overdrive happiness. I understood mine 2005 I then decided to remain middle at schools and workplaces and when free or a lone I like to look what interests me or pleases me. I had 5 face books where I followed events different names. Most of my friends I meet personally and some of them I follow facebook and they don't know am following them. Because they comment and expect me to socialize with them and I can't. So I understood I might open facebook once in a month , they would think am not respecting them. I try what I want to do and if I fail I feel like I need to be nowhere. That is why I decided to live earth as a famous person or a rich. Without the two I I can't say life is wo... [View Full Comment]
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Doreen Platt (Stumblinn) May 24, 2012
This is the first time I have ever seen an absolutely ridiculous article on one of my favorite sites (Daily Good).   Just one of the many things in it that made no sense was "People in this heightened ‘happiness overdrive’ mode engage in riskier behaviors and tend to disregard threats, including excessive alcohol consumption, binge eating, sexual promiscuity, and drug use."People who are happy do not engage in " excessive alcohol consumption, binge eating, sexual promiscuity, and drug use."   That type of behavior is what people who are seeking a way to hide from their unhappiness engage in. I drink no alcoholic beverages, eat a healthy vegetarian diet of 1200 - 1400 calories a day (I'm 4'8"), am celibate and use no recreational drugs.  When I have a day that I am feeling down, I simply examine what I am feeling and what is going on in my life and use a variety of spiritual practices to rebalance myself,  supplemented with a healthy dose of laughter yoga as needed.   No, I ... [View Full Comment]
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Rev Nagi Mato May 24, 2012

I found this article confusing and focusing more on 'mania' then anything else. Happiness is a personal thing and most times cannot be 'measured'. I find studies like this (in my personal opinion) to be a waste of time. Any study can be made to say whatever you wish it to say, depending on the outcome you are looking for.
I do agree that to feel 'too much' happiness takes one out of balance. I am more interested in balance, not just 'happiness'.

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wbblinn May 24, 2012

This is interesting...there is a Russian writer named Vadim Zeland who wrote the "Reality Transurfing" books in which he describes the downside of creating what he calls "excessive potentials"  The book is eaoteric in every way, but so much of what he says makes sense and reading this article made me think of his books.  At Manifesting Greatness we are always walking that fine line of wanting something but always from a place of knowing it is already there (otherwise we are putting out the vibration of lack, which then is matched by the outer factual world).  It is so fascinating how this external outer world is constantly reflecting back to us our inner state of being, the question is are you working to manipulate the outer world by seeking happiness outside yourself, or is the quest one that starts from, and unfolds from, within.  The only way "happiness" could possibly be bad for us is because we've forgotten its ultimate source

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Rosie May 24, 2012

Thanks for the article, I found it really encouraging! It is good to be reminded that the acceptance of the whole of life is where we find balance.  Also, I am reminded of a church seminar I attended a few years ago which was titled 'The Pursuit of Happiness?'  The main lesson I got from that seminar was that happiness is not so much a goal, but more a side effect of a balanced and holistically healthy life, of which conciously treating other people as you would like to be treated (aka kindness!), is an integral part.  I remember thinking as a child that if everybody looked out for everybody else then everybody would be looked after - I find it hard to argue with my ten year old logic, now I just have to remember to keep my end up in the grown up world, where not everyone plays by that rule!

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deborah j barnes May 24, 2012
instead "of pursuing happinessitself"..i find that acknowledging that i am part of the greater whole oflife and at once and the same a unique being (i am) gives  me the courage to believe in my self and myreason to be “here.” This opens the path of seeking  the "genie" the gift we are all bornwith that we are wired to share with the world. This whole vision thinkingcreates a happy that thrives on the risks taken in “true direction” and opensour minds to new possibilities as we grow into our “beingness”   As this resonates with "knowing" - a thoughtemotion convergence zone nestled physically in the core - you know it when youfeel it!! Getting past our cultural boundaries is the hardest part; the oldbeliefs are always ready to pull one under. Acknowledge and look for solutions that are beyond the "down" As you bring your gift forward, your strength and happiness expand, it is so worth it!  Then be grateful…thank the universe for the dance!Just experiment, see what un... [View Full Comment]
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Sharon May 24, 2012

Maybe I'm not seeing what the definition of happiness is in this article?  I consider myself happy, most of the time.  And I equate that with being content with my life.  I trust people until I am proven wrong, I try to see good in everyone, and sometimes that is difficult.  I also try not to judge and criticize, and sometimes that's pretty difficult too!  But all in all, I like my life, and I think I'm pretty happy with it.

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Michael West May 24, 2012

This article is poorly thought out and a real disappointment. If there are different kinds of happiness, why save that for point 3? It would make more sense to identify them at the outset and discuss how they may differ and create different challenges. Really, this reads like an off-the-cuff meandering across the topic, not something to be taken seriously.