Jeg hastede gennem en lufthavn og stoppede for at købe noget vand. Ved butikkens køleskab stod en mand bøjet forover og fyldte flasker i det. Jeg rakte forbi ham og trak en ud, han havde sat i køleskabet. Han kiggede op, stoppede med at arbejde, tog en flaske fra en anden hylde og rakte den frem til mig og sagde: "Denne her er kold." Jeg takkede og tog den, han tilbød mig.
Han kendte mig ikke og ville aldrig se mig igen. Hans job var lagerføring, ikke kundeservice. Han havde travlt og så træt ud. Men han tog sig tid til at registrere, at jeg havde fået en varm flaske, og han var så interesseret i mig, at han skiftede gear og hentede en kold en til mig. Han ønskede mig alt godt.
Jeg kan se hans venlige øjne, mens jeg skriver det nu, en uge senere. Det var bare en flaske vand. Men jeg føler mig varmet af hans venlighed og opmuntret af hans gode intentioner.
Når vi anerkender andres positive intentioner, føler vi os tryggere, mere støttede og gladere. Og når andre føler, at du forstår deres gode intentioner, føler de sig set, værdsat og mere tilbøjelige til at behandle dig godt.
Men det kan være svært at genkende den gode vilje i andre. Vi er travle, distraherede og stressede. Positive mål er ofte begravet under negativ adfærd. Hjernens medfødte negativitetsbias scanner konstant efter dårlige nyheder og dårlige intentioner. Hjernen reagerer også på nye ting, så den har en tendens til at ignorere de mange positive intentioner, der gennemsyrer det meste af dagligdagen, mens den fremhæver de lejlighedsvise negative.
Så du er nødt til aktivt at lede efter gode intentioner. Så vil du finde dem overalt omkring dig – et vindue ind til den dybe godhed i ethvert væsen, uanset hvor skjult den er.
Hvordan?
Tag et øjeblik til at genkende de mange gode intentioner – mål, formål og ønsker – som du har i en typisk dag.
Gode intentioner behøver ikke at være hellige. At ville nyde en kop kaffe, spise en ordentlig morgenmad, låse døren bag sig, komme på arbejde til tiden, være samvittighedsfuld, føle sig tryg, passe på en familie, være et ordentligt menneske, undgå problemer, lide mindre, nyde noget sødt, ikke skændes, leve for at se solopgangen – det er alt sammen gode intentioner.
De fleste gode intentioner vil være små. Men de betyder stadig noget. Forestil dig bare katastroferne, hvis du erstattede dine gode intentioner med dårlige! Selvfølgelig er nogle intentioner ikke så gode, såsom ønsker om at dominere, udleve vanedannende trang eller dumpe negative følelser over på andre. Men for næsten alle er langt de fleste intentioner gode. Lad det blive en følelse, en stærk fornemmelse i din krop, at du er en person med gode intentioner.
Når du taler med en ven, vær opmærksom på hans eller hendes positive intentioner. Hvordan føles det at se dem? Prøv dette rutinemæssigt med mennesker, du holder af. Jeg synes, at det hjælper mig med at forstå andre bedre, og det åbner mit hjerte. Fortæl den anden person, hvad du har lært, når det er passende; at høre en anerkendelse af ens gode intentioner kan være en stærk oplevelse.
Prøv at se gode intentioner hos fremmede, der går ned ad gaden – eller i en lufthavn. Du vil se masser af høflighed, indsats for at gøre et godt stykke arbejde, ønske om at forstå eller blive forstået, loyalitet over for venner og sager, fair play og venlighed. Denne praksis gør mig glad og giver mig en stærkere følelse af vores fælles menneskelighed.
Prøv også dette med mennesker, der er vanskelige for dig. Dette er ikke for at undskylde dem. Men at se gode intentioner midt i dårlig opførsel kan ironisk nok hjælpe dig med at føle dig mindre påvirket – mindre stresset, irriteret eller bekymret – af andre mennesker. Du kan også bede andre om at genkende de gode intentioner i dig.
Der er en glød af hellighed i hver enkelt af os, inklusive den, der ser tilbage i spejlet. At genkende gode intentioner puster på den glød, tilføjer brændstof til den og hjælper den med at vokse til en varm og smuk flamme.
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This is a great article and it is true that so many things we do in a day, or automatically are just to look after ourselves/others and we are all filled with good intentions/
Rabbi Moses Cordovero: "Remember all human beings always in the innocence of their infancy."
nice
article (technically)..but I surely see also the danger as pointed out by the
reply of Bei Yin. To ad also a critical but appreciating comment. It's not
entirely about the article but about it's base/ foundation. actually the first
sentence,, .'let our intentions be good.' What is good? what is intention? what
is the action (of letting be)? We write about it if intention and good are two
separate things. If there is a commonsense or common-consensus of 'good' and
the values that this contains and that intention is a thing we let
happen. Maybe it’s just me, and that is certainly the case, but I see things
this way; If one doesn’t dissociate oneself
from his or her intention and trains oneself to walk in line with this
intention we won’t have to spend energy in forging ourselves on terms like good
or intention. We wouldn’t have to spend any energy in creating world images of
good behavior and their fruits. Instead we would just create, we do every
moment. And the fact that there are billions of people around just means you
are not alone, make use of that instead of convicting it.
Thank you, Rick
Hanson for the article, Grenville Kleisser for the quote, Bei Yin for drawing
my attention to it, ‘dailygood’ for placing and distributing it on internet,
internet for the world wide context, and the world for creating this medium….special
thanks to creation (the action and the result….)
Just one
[Hide Full Comment]thing: If my intention is commonsense than what is it that makes it ‘my’
intention? If my intention is not commonsense than what is it that makes it ‘my’
intention?
Napoleon Hill wrote about how the tipping point of economic failure to economic recovery post great depression was based on the shift from a sense of service. Much like the man who handed you the cold bottle of water. It's that subtle a difference in giving consciousness that can change the world. Great post!
--- "It can be hard to recognize the goodwill in others. We’re busy and distracted and stressed. Positive aims are often buried beneath negative behaviors. The brain’s innate negativity bias is continually scanning for bad news, bad intentions. The brain also reacts to novelty, so it tends to ignore the many positive intentions that pervade most daily life while spotlighting the occasional negative ones."
[Hide Full Comment](Quote from Rick Hanson's article)
--- My comment: The obvious fact is, that we are all manipulated and programmed from a society that has its base on a materialistic world view. This was upgraded during centuries with religious and spiritual beliefs and confirmed in our times by intellectual scientific views and concepts. Lifestyle or behavior of people hardly have changed to a better one, in contrary: the ways and tricks to survive with ones established personality are developing with the same speed as the level of stress is rising up, with the result of disease and destruction on all levels of existence. It's easy to understand, that out of our misery and suffering, we are looking for a new way to survive...
--- Now you have the 'good intention' to manipulate the brain by 'seeing the good intention in others!' Do you really think that you can cover up the daily reality every body is facing, by using a 'positive scam' on oneself? Do you think this will change anything about the *cause*?
Wouldn't it be a better intention to find out about the real reason why we are not finding real satisfaction in our existence? Using another trick can't be a creative way to help in our growing process!
--- Since nearly forty years my (good) intention is to point to a way to go beyond ones limited view, but part of the condition of people is, that they cling on their state of being and only want to be confirmed in it, so not being open for any thing else. It seems that people must suffer much more, before they ask some critical questions about not only their surrounding, but also about themselves. At the moment all questions are answered by the established mindset from society, anything else is ignored and rejected. As long this behavior is not questioned, there is no way out. So what might be your *question*? That for sure I will answer, with the 'good intention' to have an exchange from that every body around can benefit...
--- What I have written here comes out of my 'best intention' to share what is the result from my life long experience and has helped me to grow beyond my limited personality, freeing myself in a creative and healthy way... Realizing something for myself, that can't be described by words, - only can be *lived* and so expressed through my *energy*! Then, when expressed in this writing, can easily be misunderstood, as it depends totally on the interpretation from the readers mindset. - But at least it might trigger some thoughts that are not just influenced by ones need for confirmation...
--- Or is this too much and so unwanted by the moderator?
--- "It can be hard to recognize the goodwill in others. We’re busy and distracted and stressed. Positive aims are often buried beneath negative behaviors. The brain’s innate negativity bias is
[Hide Full Comment]continually scanning for bad news, bad intentions. The brain also reacts to novelty, so it tends to ignore the many positive intentions that pervade most daily life while spotlighting the occasional negative ones." (Quote from Rick Hanson's article)
--- My comment: The obvious fact is, that we are all manipulated and programmed from a
society that has its base on a materialistic world view. This was upgraded during centuries with religious and spiritual beliefs and confirmed in our times by intellectual scientific views and concepts. Lifestyle or behavior of people hardly have changed to a better one, in contrary: the ways and tricks to survive with ones established personality are developing with the same speed as the level of stress is rising up, with the result of disease and destruction on all levels of existence. It's easy to understand, that out of our misery and suffering, we are looking for a new way to survive...
--- Now you have the 'good intention' to manipulate the brain by 'seeing the good intention in others!' Do you really think that you can cover up the daily reality every body is facing, by using a 'positive scam' on oneself? Do you think this will change anything about the *cause*?
Wouldn't it be a better intention to find out about the real reason why we are not finding real satisfaction in our existence? Using another trick can't be a creative way to help in our growing process!
--- Since nearly forty years my (good) intention is to point to a way to go beyond ones limited view, but part of the condition of people is, that they cling on their state of being and only want to be confirmed in it, so not being open for any thing else. It seems that people must suffer much more, before they ask some critical questions about not only their surrounding, but also about themselves. At the moment all questions are answered by the established mindset from society, anything else is ignored and rejected. As long this behavior is not questioned, there is no way out. So what might be your *question*? That for sure I will answer, with the 'good intention' to have an exchange from that every body around can benefit...
--- What I have written here comes out of my 'best intention' to share what is the result from my life long experience and has helped me to grow beyond my limited personality, freeing myself in a creative and healthy way... Realizing something for myself, that can't be described by words, - only can be *lived* and so expressed through my *energy*! Then, when expressed in this writing, can easily be misunderstood, as it depends totally on the interpretation from the readers mindset.
Thanks for the article!
Love this! Thank you.
So true, we see what we focus upon! thank you for the reminder.
The following sentence really made me think. "Just imagine the disasters if you replaced your good intentions with bad ones!" Thank you!