Ich eilte durch den Flughafen und hielt an, um Wasser zu kaufen. Am Kühlschrank des Ladens beugte sich ein Mann darüber und füllte ihn mit Flaschen. Ich griff an ihm vorbei und nahm eine heraus, die er gerade hineingestellt hatte. Er blickte auf, hörte auf zu arbeiten, holte eine Flasche aus einem anderen Regal und hielt sie mir hin mit den Worten: „Die ist kalt.“ Ich bedankte mich und nahm die Flasche, die er mir anbot.
Er kannte mich nicht und würde mich nie wiedersehen. Er war im Lager tätig, nicht im Kundenservice. Er war beschäftigt und sah müde aus. Trotzdem bemerkte er, dass meine Flasche warm war, und kümmerte sich so sehr darum, mir eine kalte zu bringen. Er wünschte mir alles Gute.
Ich sehe seine freundlichen Augen noch vor mir, während ich diese Zeilen schreibe, eine Woche später. Es war nur eine Flasche Wasser. Doch seine Freundlichkeit hat mich tief berührt und seine guten Absichten haben mir Mut gemacht.
Wenn wir die positiven Absichten anderer erkennen, fühlen wir uns sicherer, besser unterstützt und glücklicher. Und wenn andere spüren, dass wir ihre guten Absichten verstehen, fühlen sie sich gesehen und wertgeschätzt und sind eher geneigt, uns gut zu behandeln.
Doch es fällt uns oft schwer, die guten Absichten anderer zu erkennen. Wir sind beschäftigt, abgelenkt und gestresst. Positive Ziele werden häufig von negativem Verhalten überdeckt. Die angeborene Neigung des Gehirns, Negativität zu erkennen, sucht ständig nach schlechten Nachrichten und bösen Absichten. Da das Gehirn auch auf Neues reagiert, neigt es dazu, die vielen positiven Absichten, die den Alltag durchdringen, zu ignorieren und stattdessen die gelegentlich auftretenden negativen hervorzuheben.
Man muss also aktiv nach guten Absichten suchen. Dann findet man sie überall um sich herum – ein Fenster zum tiefen Guten in jedem Wesen, egal wie verborgen es auch sein mag.
Wie?
Nehmen Sie sich einen Moment Zeit, um die vielen guten Vorsätze – Ziele, Absichten, Wünsche – wahrzunehmen, die Sie an einem typischen Tag haben.
Gute Vorsätze müssen nicht heilig sein. Sich eine Tasse Kaffee zu gönnen, ein anständiges Frühstück zu essen, die Tür hinter sich abzuschließen, pünktlich zur Arbeit zu kommen, gewissenhaft zu sein, sich sicher zu fühlen, für die Familie zu sorgen, ein anständiger Mensch zu sein, Ärger zu vermeiden, weniger zu leiden, etwas Süßes zu genießen, nicht zu streiten, den Sonnenaufgang zu erleben – all das sind gute Vorsätze.
Die meisten guten Vorsätze sind klein. Aber sie zählen trotzdem. Stell dir nur die Katastrophen vor, wenn du deine guten Vorsätze durch schlechte ersetzen würdest! Sicher, manche Vorsätze sind nicht so gut, wie etwa der Wunsch nach Dominanz, das Ausleben von Suchtgelüsten oder das Abladen negativer Gefühle auf andere. Aber für fast jeden Menschen sind die allermeisten Vorsätze gut. Lass es zu einem Gefühl werden, zu einem starken Gefühl in deinem Körper, dass du jemand mit guten Vorsätzen bist.
Wenn du mit einem Freund oder einer Freundin sprichst, achte auf seine oder ihre positiven Absichten. Wie fühlt es sich an, sie zu erkennen? Probiere das regelmäßig mit Menschen aus, die dir wichtig sind. Ich finde, dass mir das hilft, andere besser zu verstehen und mein Herz zu öffnen. Teile der anderen Person gegebenenfalls mit, was du gelernt hast; die Anerkennung der guten Absichten eines anderen kann ein sehr bewegendes Erlebnis sein.
Versuchen Sie, bei Fremden auf der Straße oder am Flughafen ihre guten Absichten zu erkennen. Sie werden viele Höflichkeiten, Bemühungen um gute Arbeit, den Wunsch nach Verständnis und Verständnis, Treue zu Freunden und Anliegen, Fairness und Freundlichkeit beobachten. Diese Beobachtung macht mich glücklich und stärkt mein Bewusstsein für unsere gemeinsame Menschlichkeit.
Versuchen Sie dies auch bei Menschen, die Ihnen schwerfallen. Das soll sie nicht entschuldigen. Aber paradoxerweise kann es helfen, die guten Absichten hinter schlechtem Verhalten zu erkennen, damit Sie sich weniger von anderen Menschen beeinflusst fühlen – weniger gestresst, gereizt oder besorgt. Sie könnten auch andere bitten, Ihre guten Absichten zu erkennen.
In jedem von uns schlummert ein Funke Heiligkeit, auch in dem, der uns im Spiegel entgegenblickt. Das Erkennen guter Absichten facht diesen Funken an, nährt ihn und lässt ihn zu einer warmen und schönen Flamme heranwachsen.
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This is a great article and it is true that so many things we do in a day, or automatically are just to look after ourselves/others and we are all filled with good intentions/
Rabbi Moses Cordovero: "Remember all human beings always in the innocence of their infancy."
nice
article (technically)..but I surely see also the danger as pointed out by the
reply of Bei Yin. To ad also a critical but appreciating comment. It's not
entirely about the article but about it's base/ foundation. actually the first
sentence,, .'let our intentions be good.' What is good? what is intention? what
is the action (of letting be)? We write about it if intention and good are two
separate things. If there is a commonsense or common-consensus of 'good' and
the values that this contains and that intention is a thing we let
happen. Maybe it’s just me, and that is certainly the case, but I see things
this way; If one doesn’t dissociate oneself
from his or her intention and trains oneself to walk in line with this
intention we won’t have to spend energy in forging ourselves on terms like good
or intention. We wouldn’t have to spend any energy in creating world images of
good behavior and their fruits. Instead we would just create, we do every
moment. And the fact that there are billions of people around just means you
are not alone, make use of that instead of convicting it.
Thank you, Rick
Hanson for the article, Grenville Kleisser for the quote, Bei Yin for drawing
my attention to it, ‘dailygood’ for placing and distributing it on internet,
internet for the world wide context, and the world for creating this medium….special
thanks to creation (the action and the result….)
Just one
[Hide Full Comment]thing: If my intention is commonsense than what is it that makes it ‘my’
intention? If my intention is not commonsense than what is it that makes it ‘my’
intention?
Napoleon Hill wrote about how the tipping point of economic failure to economic recovery post great depression was based on the shift from a sense of service. Much like the man who handed you the cold bottle of water. It's that subtle a difference in giving consciousness that can change the world. Great post!
--- "It can be hard to recognize the goodwill in others. We’re busy and distracted and stressed. Positive aims are often buried beneath negative behaviors. The brain’s innate negativity bias is continually scanning for bad news, bad intentions. The brain also reacts to novelty, so it tends to ignore the many positive intentions that pervade most daily life while spotlighting the occasional negative ones."
[Hide Full Comment](Quote from Rick Hanson's article)
--- My comment: The obvious fact is, that we are all manipulated and programmed from a society that has its base on a materialistic world view. This was upgraded during centuries with religious and spiritual beliefs and confirmed in our times by intellectual scientific views and concepts. Lifestyle or behavior of people hardly have changed to a better one, in contrary: the ways and tricks to survive with ones established personality are developing with the same speed as the level of stress is rising up, with the result of disease and destruction on all levels of existence. It's easy to understand, that out of our misery and suffering, we are looking for a new way to survive...
--- Now you have the 'good intention' to manipulate the brain by 'seeing the good intention in others!' Do you really think that you can cover up the daily reality every body is facing, by using a 'positive scam' on oneself? Do you think this will change anything about the *cause*?
Wouldn't it be a better intention to find out about the real reason why we are not finding real satisfaction in our existence? Using another trick can't be a creative way to help in our growing process!
--- Since nearly forty years my (good) intention is to point to a way to go beyond ones limited view, but part of the condition of people is, that they cling on their state of being and only want to be confirmed in it, so not being open for any thing else. It seems that people must suffer much more, before they ask some critical questions about not only their surrounding, but also about themselves. At the moment all questions are answered by the established mindset from society, anything else is ignored and rejected. As long this behavior is not questioned, there is no way out. So what might be your *question*? That for sure I will answer, with the 'good intention' to have an exchange from that every body around can benefit...
--- What I have written here comes out of my 'best intention' to share what is the result from my life long experience and has helped me to grow beyond my limited personality, freeing myself in a creative and healthy way... Realizing something for myself, that can't be described by words, - only can be *lived* and so expressed through my *energy*! Then, when expressed in this writing, can easily be misunderstood, as it depends totally on the interpretation from the readers mindset. - But at least it might trigger some thoughts that are not just influenced by ones need for confirmation...
--- Or is this too much and so unwanted by the moderator?
--- "It can be hard to recognize the goodwill in others. We’re busy and distracted and stressed. Positive aims are often buried beneath negative behaviors. The brain’s innate negativity bias is
[Hide Full Comment]continually scanning for bad news, bad intentions. The brain also reacts to novelty, so it tends to ignore the many positive intentions that pervade most daily life while spotlighting the occasional negative ones." (Quote from Rick Hanson's article)
--- My comment: The obvious fact is, that we are all manipulated and programmed from a
society that has its base on a materialistic world view. This was upgraded during centuries with religious and spiritual beliefs and confirmed in our times by intellectual scientific views and concepts. Lifestyle or behavior of people hardly have changed to a better one, in contrary: the ways and tricks to survive with ones established personality are developing with the same speed as the level of stress is rising up, with the result of disease and destruction on all levels of existence. It's easy to understand, that out of our misery and suffering, we are looking for a new way to survive...
--- Now you have the 'good intention' to manipulate the brain by 'seeing the good intention in others!' Do you really think that you can cover up the daily reality every body is facing, by using a 'positive scam' on oneself? Do you think this will change anything about the *cause*?
Wouldn't it be a better intention to find out about the real reason why we are not finding real satisfaction in our existence? Using another trick can't be a creative way to help in our growing process!
--- Since nearly forty years my (good) intention is to point to a way to go beyond ones limited view, but part of the condition of people is, that they cling on their state of being and only want to be confirmed in it, so not being open for any thing else. It seems that people must suffer much more, before they ask some critical questions about not only their surrounding, but also about themselves. At the moment all questions are answered by the established mindset from society, anything else is ignored and rejected. As long this behavior is not questioned, there is no way out. So what might be your *question*? That for sure I will answer, with the 'good intention' to have an exchange from that every body around can benefit...
--- What I have written here comes out of my 'best intention' to share what is the result from my life long experience and has helped me to grow beyond my limited personality, freeing myself in a creative and healthy way... Realizing something for myself, that can't be described by words, - only can be *lived* and so expressed through my *energy*! Then, when expressed in this writing, can easily be misunderstood, as it depends totally on the interpretation from the readers mindset.
Thanks for the article!
Love this! Thank you.
So true, we see what we focus upon! thank you for the reminder.
The following sentence really made me think. "Just imagine the disasters if you replaced your good intentions with bad ones!" Thank you!