Apressando-me pelo aeroporto, parei para comprar água. No refrigerador da loja, um homem estava curvado, colocando garrafas dentro. Estendi a mão por cima dele e peguei uma que ele havia colocado lá. Ele olhou para cima, parou de trabalhar, pegou uma garrafa de outra prateleira e me ofereceu, dizendo: "Esta está gelada". Agradeci e peguei a que ele me ofereceu.
Ele não me conhecia e nunca mais me veria. Seu trabalho era repor mercadorias, não atendimento ao cliente. Estava ocupado e parecia cansado. Mas ele se deu ao trabalho de notar que eu havia pegado uma garrafa quente e se importou o suficiente para mudar de função e me trazer uma gelada. Ele me desejou tudo de bom.
Uma semana depois, consigo ver seus olhos amigáveis enquanto escrevo. Era apenas uma garrafa de água. Mas me sinto aquecida por sua gentileza e revigorada por suas boas intenções.
Ao reconhecermos as boas intenções dos outros, nos sentimos mais seguros, apoiados e felizes. E quando os outros percebem que compreendemos suas boas intenções, eles se sentem vistos, valorizados e mais propensos a nos tratar bem.
Mas pode ser difícil reconhecer a boa vontade nos outros. Estamos ocupados, distraídos e estressados. Objetivos positivos muitas vezes ficam soterrados por comportamentos negativos. A tendência inata do cérebro à negatividade está constantemente à procura de más notícias e más intenções. O cérebro também reage à novidade, por isso tende a ignorar as muitas intenções positivas que permeiam a maior parte da vida diária, enquanto destaca as negativas ocasionais.
Portanto, você precisa procurar ativamente por boas intenções. Então, você as encontrará ao seu redor — uma janela para a bondade profunda em cada ser, por mais obscurecida que esteja.
Como?
Reserve um minuto para reconhecer as muitas boas intenções — objetivos, propósitos, desejos — que você tem em um dia típico.
Boas intenções não precisam ser santas. Querer tomar uma xícara de café, comer um bom café da manhã, trancar a porta ao sair de casa, chegar ao trabalho na hora, ser consciencioso, sentir-se seguro, cuidar da família, ser uma pessoa decente, evitar problemas, sofrer menos, saborear algo doce, não brigar, viver para ver o nascer do sol — tudo isso são boas intenções.
A maioria das boas intenções será pequena. Mas ainda assim importa. Imagine os desastres se você substituísse suas boas intenções por más! Claro, algumas intenções não são tão boas, como o desejo de dominar, ceder a impulsos viciantes ou descarregar sentimentos negativos nos outros. Mas, para quase todos, a grande maioria das intenções são boas. Deixe que isso se torne um sentimento, uma forte percepção em seu corpo, de que você é alguém com boas intenções.
Ao conversar com um amigo, preste atenção às suas boas intenções. Como você se sente ao percebê-las? Experimente fazer isso regularmente com as pessoas de quem você gosta. Descobri que isso me ajuda a entender melhor os outros e também a abrir meu coração. Quando for apropriado, diga à outra pessoa o que você aprendeu; ouvir o reconhecimento das boas intenções de alguém pode ser uma experiência transformadora.
Tente observar as boas intenções em estranhos caminhando pela rua — ou em um aeroporto. Você verá muita cortesia, esforço para fazer um bom trabalho, desejo de compreender ou ser compreendido, lealdade a amigos e causas, espírito esportivo e gentileza. Essa prática me faz feliz e me dá uma noção mais forte da nossa humanidade em comum.
Experimente também com pessoas que lhe são difíceis. Isso não significa desculpá-las. Mas enxergar boas intenções em meio a comportamentos ruins pode, ironicamente, ajudar você a se sentir menos afetado — menos estressado, irritado ou preocupado — pelas outras pessoas. Você também pode pedir que os outros reconheçam as boas intenções em você.
Existe uma chama de pureza em cada um de nós, inclusive naquela que se reflete no espelho. Reconhecer as boas intenções alimenta essa chama, dá-lhe combustível e ajuda-a a crescer até se tornar uma chama calorosa e bela.
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This is a great article and it is true that so many things we do in a day, or automatically are just to look after ourselves/others and we are all filled with good intentions/
Rabbi Moses Cordovero: "Remember all human beings always in the innocence of their infancy."
nice
article (technically)..but I surely see also the danger as pointed out by the
reply of Bei Yin. To ad also a critical but appreciating comment. It's not
entirely about the article but about it's base/ foundation. actually the first
sentence,, .'let our intentions be good.' What is good? what is intention? what
is the action (of letting be)? We write about it if intention and good are two
separate things. If there is a commonsense or common-consensus of 'good' and
the values that this contains and that intention is a thing we let
happen. Maybe it’s just me, and that is certainly the case, but I see things
this way; If one doesn’t dissociate oneself
from his or her intention and trains oneself to walk in line with this
intention we won’t have to spend energy in forging ourselves on terms like good
or intention. We wouldn’t have to spend any energy in creating world images of
good behavior and their fruits. Instead we would just create, we do every
moment. And the fact that there are billions of people around just means you
are not alone, make use of that instead of convicting it.
Thank you, Rick
Hanson for the article, Grenville Kleisser for the quote, Bei Yin for drawing
my attention to it, ‘dailygood’ for placing and distributing it on internet,
internet for the world wide context, and the world for creating this medium….special
thanks to creation (the action and the result….)
Just one
[Hide Full Comment]thing: If my intention is commonsense than what is it that makes it ‘my’
intention? If my intention is not commonsense than what is it that makes it ‘my’
intention?
Napoleon Hill wrote about how the tipping point of economic failure to economic recovery post great depression was based on the shift from a sense of service. Much like the man who handed you the cold bottle of water. It's that subtle a difference in giving consciousness that can change the world. Great post!
--- "It can be hard to recognize the goodwill in others. We’re busy and distracted and stressed. Positive aims are often buried beneath negative behaviors. The brain’s innate negativity bias is continually scanning for bad news, bad intentions. The brain also reacts to novelty, so it tends to ignore the many positive intentions that pervade most daily life while spotlighting the occasional negative ones."
[Hide Full Comment](Quote from Rick Hanson's article)
--- My comment: The obvious fact is, that we are all manipulated and programmed from a society that has its base on a materialistic world view. This was upgraded during centuries with religious and spiritual beliefs and confirmed in our times by intellectual scientific views and concepts. Lifestyle or behavior of people hardly have changed to a better one, in contrary: the ways and tricks to survive with ones established personality are developing with the same speed as the level of stress is rising up, with the result of disease and destruction on all levels of existence. It's easy to understand, that out of our misery and suffering, we are looking for a new way to survive...
--- Now you have the 'good intention' to manipulate the brain by 'seeing the good intention in others!' Do you really think that you can cover up the daily reality every body is facing, by using a 'positive scam' on oneself? Do you think this will change anything about the *cause*?
Wouldn't it be a better intention to find out about the real reason why we are not finding real satisfaction in our existence? Using another trick can't be a creative way to help in our growing process!
--- Since nearly forty years my (good) intention is to point to a way to go beyond ones limited view, but part of the condition of people is, that they cling on their state of being and only want to be confirmed in it, so not being open for any thing else. It seems that people must suffer much more, before they ask some critical questions about not only their surrounding, but also about themselves. At the moment all questions are answered by the established mindset from society, anything else is ignored and rejected. As long this behavior is not questioned, there is no way out. So what might be your *question*? That for sure I will answer, with the 'good intention' to have an exchange from that every body around can benefit...
--- What I have written here comes out of my 'best intention' to share what is the result from my life long experience and has helped me to grow beyond my limited personality, freeing myself in a creative and healthy way... Realizing something for myself, that can't be described by words, - only can be *lived* and so expressed through my *energy*! Then, when expressed in this writing, can easily be misunderstood, as it depends totally on the interpretation from the readers mindset. - But at least it might trigger some thoughts that are not just influenced by ones need for confirmation...
--- Or is this too much and so unwanted by the moderator?
--- "It can be hard to recognize the goodwill in others. We’re busy and distracted and stressed. Positive aims are often buried beneath negative behaviors. The brain’s innate negativity bias is
[Hide Full Comment]continually scanning for bad news, bad intentions. The brain also reacts to novelty, so it tends to ignore the many positive intentions that pervade most daily life while spotlighting the occasional negative ones." (Quote from Rick Hanson's article)
--- My comment: The obvious fact is, that we are all manipulated and programmed from a
society that has its base on a materialistic world view. This was upgraded during centuries with religious and spiritual beliefs and confirmed in our times by intellectual scientific views and concepts. Lifestyle or behavior of people hardly have changed to a better one, in contrary: the ways and tricks to survive with ones established personality are developing with the same speed as the level of stress is rising up, with the result of disease and destruction on all levels of existence. It's easy to understand, that out of our misery and suffering, we are looking for a new way to survive...
--- Now you have the 'good intention' to manipulate the brain by 'seeing the good intention in others!' Do you really think that you can cover up the daily reality every body is facing, by using a 'positive scam' on oneself? Do you think this will change anything about the *cause*?
Wouldn't it be a better intention to find out about the real reason why we are not finding real satisfaction in our existence? Using another trick can't be a creative way to help in our growing process!
--- Since nearly forty years my (good) intention is to point to a way to go beyond ones limited view, but part of the condition of people is, that they cling on their state of being and only want to be confirmed in it, so not being open for any thing else. It seems that people must suffer much more, before they ask some critical questions about not only their surrounding, but also about themselves. At the moment all questions are answered by the established mindset from society, anything else is ignored and rejected. As long this behavior is not questioned, there is no way out. So what might be your *question*? That for sure I will answer, with the 'good intention' to have an exchange from that every body around can benefit...
--- What I have written here comes out of my 'best intention' to share what is the result from my life long experience and has helped me to grow beyond my limited personality, freeing myself in a creative and healthy way... Realizing something for myself, that can't be described by words, - only can be *lived* and so expressed through my *energy*! Then, when expressed in this writing, can easily be misunderstood, as it depends totally on the interpretation from the readers mindset.
Thanks for the article!
Love this! Thank you.
So true, we see what we focus upon! thank you for the reminder.
The following sentence really made me think. "Just imagine the disasters if you replaced your good intentions with bad ones!" Thank you!