或许正因为我能滔滔不绝，所以我才如此热爱，甚至渴望沉默。沉默让我感到安全。我知道我不会脱口而出一些愚蠢或伤人的话，一些让我后悔的话。这大概就是为什么，如果你向灵性导师请教如何做到言辞得体，他们很可能会用一个词来回答：沉默。就像雨水滋养花朵一样，沉默对于清晰表达也至关重要。
印度教的一句谚语（其他文化中也有类似的谚语）反映了这种关系：如果你要说的话是真诚的、友善的、有用的，那就说出来；如果不是，沉默是最好的。
我最早体会到沉默的价值以及恶语伤人的痛苦后果，是在小学的时候。我不记得那天早上妈妈做了什么或没做什么，但不管怎样，都让我非常生气，我冲她大吼：“我恨你！我希望你去死！”长大后我才知道，孩子们说出这种恶毒的话并不罕见，但当时我却因为没有克制住自己而付出了惨痛的代价。爸爸狠狠地揍了我一顿，我哭得撕心裂肺，那天根本没法去上课。
智者们强调沉默的价值，其原因更具建设性。他们认为沉默有助于我们明智地运用自身资源。说话会消耗精力，也会占用时间。我努力与朋友保持密切联系，但我也知道，长时间的电话聊天会让时间飞逝。虽然我喜欢和朋友一起徒步旅行，聊聊彼此的近况，但我发现，和我的狗安静地散步时，感觉截然不同。运动让我神清气爽，我的精力也更集中于需要完成的工作。
沉默也帮助我表达真正重要的事情，而不是那些一闪而过的念头。有时，在和丈夫争吵的过程中，或者为了避免争吵，我会选择暂停。如果我没有停下来散散步或静坐冥想，好好思考一下事情的真相，我可能就会继续说出伤人的话。在沉默中，我有机会冷静下来，评估形势，审视自己的动机，并思考哪些话语能够弥合我们之间的裂痕。
希伯来圣经告诉我们，沉默也是区分真先知和骗子的一种方式。先知们以沉默为标准，将“麦子”和“麦穗”区分开来。假先知滔滔不绝，而真先知则视预言为神圣的恩赐，不可滥用。在基大利被杀后，百姓向耶利米寻求建议，这位先知并没有立即回应。相反，他沉默了十天，才传达上帝的信息。
我发现静默具有疗愈作用，不仅在精神层面，也在身心层面。有些人喜欢去水疗中心放松身心，享受各种水疗和按摩护理。而我则喜欢去静修，用静默来宠爱自己。没有语音留言，没有电子邮件，没有交谈，没有收音机，没有视频。静默如同炎炎夏日里的一场清凉淋浴，让我神清气爽。在这份宁静中，我得以收集并整合自己破碎的碎片。静默如同良药，清除现代都市生活永不停歇的喧嚣所积累的疲惫，恢复我的能量。但对我有益的，对别人未必是良药。老师们也承认，对于那些容易忧郁或抑郁的人来说，沉默或许并非最佳的灵修方式。他们或许需要敞开心扉，表达自我。此外，面对不公，保持沉默也并非明智之举。达赖喇嘛在《新千年伦理》中指出，如果我们出于自我中心而保持沉默，那便成了问题。我们肩负着打破沉默、服务他人的普遍责任。但首先，需要谨记：正是在沉默的孕育中，我们才能孕育出最佳行动方案，并确保这些行动根植于慈悲与智慧。如果我们选择发声，首先要做的便是让自己的言行与世界的需要相契合，而非迎合我们自身的欲望，否则我们可能会因无意识的言语而造成更大的伤害。
想要开始享受静默的美好，不妨先练习一下。在拿起餐具吃饭或端起杯子喝咖啡或茶之前，我们可以先静默片刻。在打电话之前，我们也可以保持安静。与其急于滔滔不绝地讲述自己的生活，不如给对方留出空间，耐心倾听他们的诉说。久而久之，当我们学会闭嘴时，我们会发现自己也在学习如何平息纷乱的思绪和激情。正如一位犹太圣贤所说：“智慧的篱笆是沉默。”
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One truth we cannot avoid discern is, great works, be it in art, music or even science, are always preceded by a phase of quietness – peaceful silence. That is an essential prerequisite ingredient. If one digs deeper into silence, as Yoga meditation will teach you, you are essentially trying to empty your conscious and subconscious minds of all slack, of all objects to truly realise your True Self hidden deep behind. The enlightened masters have achieved that and one reflection of it is their very eyes and face radiating it, as for example you find in a photo of Sri Ramana Maharshi (a great celebrated mystic from South India the last century).
Many normal people seek external silence first to seek internal peace which is also an important factor. You cannot become peaceful in a constantly turbulent, loud environment. Some run to mountains, others to quiet islands on Globe and others to quiet lush ambience of nature. But if you were to take your mobile phone with you in this expedition and were to listen to jazzy pop, it would derail the very purpose of your enterprise. Even thriller books will agitate your mind, are of least help to relax. Your real target ought be everlasting internal Peace (of Mind). Overcoming your ‘Ego’ or silencing it, is not easy; it is a constant struggle. The more you try attaining it, the more you are rewarded with it in gradual progress. That is the experience and teaching of great saints and mystics. Do not give up efforts to gain ‘Peace Eternal’ internal. Some day you pick your cherished prize !
George Chakko, former U.N. correspondent, now retiree in Vienna, Austria.
[Hide Full Comment]Vienna, 14/04/ 2019 22:25 hrs CET
I agree that silence is an important everyday experience. While I enjoy most types of music, there are days I simply enjoy the quiet. It's not necessary to have a conversation just because two or more people are in the same space. You don't have to meditate or figure out a solution or demand anything of yourself in any way. Just be. Appreciate that you do have the luxury of slicing out a small amount of time for peaceful solitude.
Thank you for the reminder of the power of silence. Each day I do my best to meditate even if for only 10 to 15 minutes, it clears and quiets. <3 Each weekend I do my best to take a 24 hour sabbatical from the internet, it helps quiet my mind.